Continued from last week
The Seeker
The seeker often has a rather twisted idea about love. He thinks it is something God given, that lasts forever. He does not realize, that love might be an emotion, but it is the thing that makes a relationship worth fighting for.
A good relationship is work!
A good relationship helps you to grow as a person and this, in most cases, causes pain. Some women by the way have a similar attitude. They call it soul mate. Woman tend to sit and wait and decline one suitor after the other, because they feel it is not their soul mate. Some men looking for their soul mate become womanizers. Because they do not know from the start, or even before, if this will be the one relationship they are looking for.
I had the tendency to write it is sad. But is it really? What if it is only one aspect of life? What if a Soul has to go through all this to learn to love truly?
Is there a way out? Yes, stop looking (girls stop waiting). Live is about doing. So take a partner and make it work!
The Giver
Most of them have reached a certain age. Not that it would not be possible for them to get younger girls, but if you have mastered a trade you start fine tuning it. Giving love is one way to do it. Sure you can argue: “Then stay with one woman!” No doubt this is a good suggestion. But if you look at the situation here in the Philippines, there is no divorce and you are bound for a life time. I have seen cases where the woman was dumped, waited 10, 20 years or more, and when the man was old and sick came back and the woman took him in. A dear friend of mine, he is a kind soul, does not womanize with young girls. He explained to me, that he outgrew them. But he likes to give something to this group of woman. He said: ”I know for them the center of their life are their children”, and he continues,”this will never change, but I dont want to be pushed aside whenever there is a family problem. So I am with them. Love them, make them feel loved, and believe me, I love them with all my heart when I am with them, but like rain, or like the night it ends …”
I asked him if it does not hurt?
“Sometimes it does, but look”, he continued,”due to my work I am in one place only for a certain time, then my boss sends me to another town or sometimes even another country. I could stay alone and go to bars and drink. But it is not my way. I know”, he said, “and this makes me proud, I made these woman feel loved and this is something they will remember for the rest of their life.”
Did this list make your attitude towards womanizers change? Is it fate or a chance? Is it necessary? Lets not judge them, lets not pity them. There is a reason for it!
I had a Chinese friend, married to a rich Chinese man, who was a womanizer. Despite his riches she run away and went through quite some hardship. I really appreciate people like that. We once were talking about womanizing. And she had said:”It is the man’s loss, when their wives turn away from them.”
Ever since, every now and then this pops up in my mind and I wonder how it is true.
What is the purpose of a failed marriage?
Let’s look into it next week.
I am soul in a male body and I "think" I came into this life to learn about love and lovers
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